Weeping while watching

Weeping while watching the world wander 'round.
And the world wanders 'round and I wonder why.

"Why," I sigh as I eye the sky.
Why try to fly if we all simply die?

I suppose living is leaving a legacy,
I suppose he who lives holds the heart of humanity.

Though my life may be a life short lived,
I pray it give God glory, inspiring others who live.

Life is not about me and how high I can fly.
So I watch to world weeping and know the glory is God's.

Sonnets Aren't So Hard...

I had almost given up on winter yesterday. I walked outside to find it all warm and humid. It was nasty. I thought winter had, in fact, lasted about a week and then up 'n left. However yesterday was a windy day. The cool was blown back in, so it seems like I will be able to enjoy it for a few more days.

We've been studying sonnets in English. My teacher suggested that a sonnet is the masterpiece of any poet. "If you can write a sonnet, then you are a true poet!" I took this as a challenge. I decided that I wanted to try my hand at writing a sonnet.

Today during English I completely spaced out. We were talking about other types of poetry, but I was, instead, writing a sonnet. I did not find it all that hard. No, it's not perfect. But Shakespeare's are not perfect either! I did not follow the typical theme of a sonnet which is "I am so sad and lonely, life is horrible and gloomy, but when I think of you daffodils bloom." I instead decided to write about a relationship with God.

Light like the Son

Some may say life is completely empty
When living it absent from God above,
But satisfaction and success, I see,
When I look upon lives outside Your love
I see riches and wealth with smiling face.
There's love and joy with relations galore.
'Tis true that joy can be found in this place,
But more can be found elsewhere, I implore!
There are beauties upon this world that sing
Of glories found far beyond here and now.
I look to the sky, see the sun which brings
Light like the Son who has shone and will show.
So life may seem full, singing songs of love,
But the music, it falls from far above.

Innocent Romance

At the beginning of a whole new story
I just finished my last one
At the start of a whole new chapter
I don't know who I'll become.

Sometimes I wonder if I have a chance
At some simple innocent romance
As sure as the sun rises over the horizon
I'm stuck inside where I can't see
And I wonder if it's meant to be.

I write this song today
'Cause I don't know what will come my way
I sing this song now
'Cause I don't know how
This is all gonna finish

I don't know how this will end
But I know you're at least my friend.

The cloud sits on the ground this morning
As a sign that You are here from up above
If I don't know where I am going
At least I know I have Your love

I write this song today
'Cause I don't know what will come my way
I sing this song now
'Cause I don't know how
This is all gonna finish.

I don't know what to do
But I will rely on You
To get me through.

Peace in a World That Never Stops

The past two weeks have been a wild whirlwind of work and wrestling. The retreat was last weekend, so that was a bit of a break. But everything around it has been mass chaos.

The second hand is always turning
And my heart is always beating,
The work keeps coming
And I am hardly breathing.

This past week, especially, has been a doozy. I've had, it seems, endless homework. It's been crunch time for the musical because our performance is later this next week. I've had to work almost every night this week. This puts me leaving home a little after 7 in the morning, staying after school for musical practice until 5, rushing home to eat and change clothes, then running off to work from 6-9:30 and getting back home around 10 with homework and a head waiting for a pillow with eyes ready to shut.

Inside of this mess I've hardly had a chance to breathe. I think it's unrealistic that anyone should be expected to do this much. School, work, extra-curricular activities, have active relationships with friends, family, and God. I feel so disconnected from my family, friends, and from God. I'm so thirsty. So often I simply want to run away and find escape, but all I can do is turn to God.

Today has been a glorious sabbath for me. It has been a day of rest. A day to focus on God. A day to not worry about other things. Inside of this noise that has been my past two weeks, today God says:

Be silent before Me!
And let people renew their strength.
---
Your Redeemer is the Holy One of Israel.
---
The poor and the needy seek water,
but there is none;
their tongues are parched with thirst.
I, the LORD, will answer them;
I, the God of Israel, do not forsake them.
---
For just as rain and snow fall from heaven,
and do not return there
without saturating the earth,
and making it germinate and sprout,
and providing seed to sow
and food to eat,
so My word that comes from My mouth
will not return to Me empty,
but it will accomplish what I please,
and will prosper in what I sent it to do.
---
I will open rivers on the barren heights,
and springs in the middle of the plains.
I will turn the desert into a pool of water.
and dry land into springs of water.
I will plant cedars in the desert,
acacias, myrtles, and olive trees,
I will put cypress trees in the desert,
elms and box trees together
so that all may see and know,
consider and understand,
that the hand of the LORD has done this,
the Holy One of Israel has created it.

So, as I sit here on the edge of this weekend about to take a downward plunge into next week, I pray for strength. I pray for water. I pray for peace. I pray for God's word to rain(reign) down on me and make me clean and saturate me. I pray for His peace to be upon me this week. And I ask most of all that the Holy One of Israel be glorified in all that I do.

Isaiah 41:1, 14b, 17, 55:10-11, 41:18-20

Shalom of Adonai

The stars weren't very loud last night, but the wind sang through the trees. The leaves were singing choruses; all saying the same line: "Ssshhhhh..." Like a graceful animal in deep slumber, nature took slow, deep breaths.

I was drawn in. All of creation was lulling me into the shalom of Adonai. There was nothing to worry about. My heart beat and my breath in sync with the rhythm of nature.

A soft buzz in my hand, I answered my phone to hear her sweet voice greet me. I could do nothing but smile and tell her of the clouds floating by above the canopy of singing leaves. I wished so much for her to be there with me. We wouldn't have to talk. We could just listen to the music. We wouldn't interrupt, but sing along; gracing one another with our presence. What would there be to worry about? We would just simply be. Our souls sitting there so intimate, so close. We would be sharing in the shalom of El Shaddai Adonai. But as it is this has not yet come to pass.

All I can do
Is hope and pray
That Adonai would send us
Each other's way.

But for now I sit
And breathe with the wind.
I sing with the trees
And take it all in.

My life is at peace
As I breathe Your shalom.
I know that I'm here
And that I'm heading home.

Something About Scripture

I don't understand it. But something about scripture resonates with the soul. It's like warmth. It's like clear, running water. It's like hot tea late at night. It's like hugs. It's like love. It's like pillows. It's like a blanket. It's like holding hands. It's like soft music. It's like resonating strings. It's like a pure voice singing through the air. It's like a dove. It's like a deep conversation late at night. It's like a cup of coffee with a friend. It's You.

In the beginning was the Word,
and the Word was with God,
and the Word was God.